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When to let go of a relationship

May 24, 2013

Humans are funny creatures. They tend to either dump great relationships, or cling to disastrous ones. Typically, women are the clingers because their emotions rule them, and the men are usually the ones that walk out. It seems that relationships, more than ever, are fragile and temporary. However, there are those relationships that are lingering way beyond the point of each party going their separate ways.

It’s been said that if someone makes you miserable more than they make you happy, it doesn’t matter how much you love them, you need to let them go. More often than not, this is a very difficult thing to do. Many women still believe they need a man to complete them. Sometimes any man will do. Unfortunately, some believe this to the point of staying in an abusive relationship. When asked why they stay, often the answer is because they love the abuser. They accept the apologies and promises of reformed behavior until it happens again, and too often ends with the woman being in the ICU, or the morgue.

Men will destroy a good relationship because his eyes and thoughts tend to wander. When caught in an affair, a man will often say that it meant nothing to him. Often this statement is right on the money. It’s the-grass-is-greener concept, in the context of a relationship. They never really mean to leave, they get side tracked, and the heart wants what the heart wants. While others believe that men are superior to women, and it’s their duty to be physically, verbally, and emotionally abusive.

A lack of trust will destroy a relationship, sometimes quicker than a physically abusive one.  There is something about the lies and secrets when a partner cheats that are almost insurmountable. When trust dies, a little bit of the partner betrayed dies with it. A bitterness seeps into the relationship, and it rarely survives.

Letting your relationship get stagnant, and not growing with your partner will eventually cause conflict. Going in opposite directions and never reaching back for your partner will signal the end of your relationship, and the need to go separate ways.

Eleanor Roosevelt said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” If you are in a relationship that makes you doubt your self-worth, your value as a human being, it’s time to let go. If you are withdrawing from family and friends, and are covering bruises with makeup, it’s time to let go. If you no longer have trust with your partner, it’s time to let go. If there are more things wrong with your relationship than right, it’s time to let go.

Before you beat yourself up over a lost relationship, hold your head up and say this to yourself, “I’ve made mistakes in my life. I’ve let people take advantage of me, and I accepted way less than I deserved. However, I’ve learned from my bad choices, and even though there are some things I can never get back, and people who will never be sorry, I know better next time and I won’t settle for anything less than I deserve.”  Unknown

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6 Comments
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